The mullet is gone. The name lives on.
Radek Bonk, who scored 42 goals for Las Vegas Thunder of the International Hockey League as a 17-year-old and was so popular with the Ottawa Senators that a website named for his distinctive hairstyle – Bonk’s Mullet – persists to this day, makes quite a mess Run in ESPN.com’s Greatest NHL Names Bracket.
In fact, Bonk (who represents the Modern International Region) made it to the name game final of ESPN ice hockey writer Greg Wyshynski before losing to Guy Lafleur. Greg McKegg (Modern North American Region) and Hakan Loob (Actual Objects Region) rounded out Wyshynski’s last four.
In a big surprise, the sixth seeded Bonk defeated the top seeded Miroslav Satan in one of Wyshynski’s regional finals.
The hockey guru wrote: “The last two are, to me, the essence of the National Hockey League. They have the poetic oomph of Guy Lafleur, a French-Canadian name that wafts through the air, leaving behind the faint scent of maple and cigarettes. You have the outspoken power of Radek Bonk, a name that metaphorically crushes you.
“Radek Bonk sounds like noises made by a real hockey game.”
– Greg Wyshynski (@wyshynski) 23 May 2018
Sachin Chandan, who would also have been a good name for a hockey player but is actually an ESPN researcher, also got Bonk to the finals before losing to Loob.
One Bonk follower wrote on Twitter: “Bonk has been robbed! That was manipulated from the start! Massive fraud! “
Another wrote, “Oh (expletive). (Just) wait until @ Bonk’sMullet sees that. ”
Bonk was robbed! That was manipulated from the start! Massive scams! (But seriously, how doesn’t Bonk win this?)
– El Guapo (@DrHorrablySexy) December 9, 2020
Zarley Zalapski was robbed. It’s hard enough to start your last name with a Z, but his first name did too. Imagine all of the things growing up where they went, in alphabetical order, poor guy. He deserves that.
– Paul Zarnett (@paulzarnett) December 9, 2020
Around the horn
– Following Hawaii’s 28-14 win over Houston at the New Mexico Bowl in Frisco, Texas, Mountain West tweeted that the conference is now 5-0 in bowl games against the American Athletic Conference.
MWC media darling Boise State is reportedly considering moving to the AAC. If you didn’t know better, you might have thought that the Colorado Springs home office sends a subtle reminder that the grass on the other side of the football fence isn’t always bluer.
– Mountain West (@MountainWest) December 25, 2020
– In memory of FC Barcelona’s Lionel Messi, the Peles long-standing record with his 644.
Had the King of Beers done the same for the former top scorer, Alan Mayer would have been spared such a good-natured disgrace. Mayer was the goalkeeper of the short-lived Las Vegas Quicksilvers on April 9, 1977, conceding a goal against Pele and the New York Cosmos.
It was the first North American Soccer League game to be played at Sam Boyd Stadium. Despite the presence of the magnetic pele, it only attracted 11,896 people.
Eusebio was on the line-up for Las Vegas. The Portuguese goalscorer also remained goalless. The only goal of the game was scored by Victor Arbelaez, a former Bishop Gorman football coach who died in 2007 at the age of 54.
🍾 To celebrate Messi’s record: @Budweiser send a personalized bottle to every goalkeeper Messi has scored in his career and some GKs receive more than one. All bottles will have a different number that would refer to Messi’s goal record. #FCB ️ pic.twitter.com/MERc9ui4AI
– Reshad Rahman ✆ (@HagridFCB) December 24, 2020
– Here’s the bare truth about Gritty, the official and somewhat scary mascot of the Philadelphia Flyers described as an acid trip: He’s been cleared for return to the ice (subject to a positive COVID test) by the Philadelphia Health Department, since, as well as the NHL, after a petition received 10,000+ signatures and a letter of support from a pornographic website.
A Vice President of Stripchat wrote that if Gritty was not allowed to cheer the Flyers at the Wells Fargo Center, he would be willing to offer him a place on the site’s home page. In the letter, Stripchat claimed that it attracted 906,181,416 new users in 2020, who can be assumed that none of them seemed terribly interested in driving the Zamboni.
One porn site has an offer for Flyers mascots @GrittyNHL to live stream games in the years ’20-21.
➖ “We want to make you a global superstar. … The Philly Phanatic can even join your stream.”
➖Gritty is currently filing with the NHL to allow him to play in games this season pic.twitter.com/IxTJk6kK5T
– Mark J. Burns (@ markjburns88) December 23, 2020
I can’t get over the face shield with Gritty. https://t.co/1aIJxf0NzF
– Kristen Rodgers (@KristenERodgers) May 12, 2020
If you were among those who kept a Cal Ripken-esque A Christmas story alive this year, it is possible (but unlikely) that you noticed a scene where three baseball cards are pinned to the wall above Ralphie’s bed.
Even more astute is the eyesight of a Twitter user named Tom Shiber, who, after posting an enlarged photo of the cards, revealed their origins: a 1940 Play Ball picture of New York Giants outfielder Johnny Rucker and T206 tobacco cards depicting pitcher Ed Ruelbach who threw a one-hitter for the Chicago Cubs in the 1906 World Series; and Jimmy Hart, an obscure infielder for the 1901 Baltimore Orioles, who became the first American League player to be suspended for hitting a referee.
I triple dog challenge you to ask a better quiz question.
I’ve seen A Christmas Story 372 times, but it wasn’t until last year that I noticed Ralphie’s vintage baseball cards on his headboard. @SABRbbcards @baseballcardESP @WaxPackGods @wthballs @sportcardbacks @bsblcardvandals @baseballinpix @CardboardHistory @prewarcards @cardgrader pic.twitter.com/UcSrOZZv8L